Archive for the ‘Writings’ Category

Loving Myself for Valentine’s Day

Sunday, February 14th, 2016

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This Valentine’s Day marks ten months, one week and four days since I last had sex. I know what you’re thinking. How the Hell is a woman in her sexual prime abstinent longer than gestation? Easy. I spent time loving myself instead of looking for love through sexual gratification.

My relocation to Seattle wasn’t easy and it certainly wasn’t the transition I expected. Something felt missing and it wasn’t just the D. My emotionally unavailable Tinder swipes didn’t cut it, because who wants to date an indecisive mope? Instead of looking for seven inches of satisfaction (fingers crossed anyway) I focused on bettering myself. I joined a yoga studio, perfected cannabis photography, overhauled my interior decor and made peace with the Pacific Northwest. I focused on the relationship with myself and I loved it.

So why don’t more women do this?

If I read one more *feminist* blog where women unabashedly rip apart their one night stands, I’m going to punch my monitor. Female-focused media (I’m looking at you Cosmopolitan and SATC) perpetuate the notion women have to get laid, even if it means disrespecting themselves in the process.

Here’s a feeble notion for my sexually active generation — stop sleeping with people who don’t or won’t respect you. Share your energy with partners who appreciate it, not those who feel entitled to it. I’m by no means perfect, nor holding out for marriage, but I am dang picky, as women should be. Give your goddess energy to a man who’s worth it. It makes the whole experience more fulfilling, both physically and emotionally. Plus no worries about him bouncing before you climax.

Just to clarify, I’m not bashing hookups or one-night stands. In fact, I have three close friends who married theirs, but that’s the exception to the rule. I mean really ladies, can you expect a guy who invested an hour of drunken conversation over a $12 cocktail to care about your orgasm?

For most of the dating pool, we drown in hormones and confusion after fucking on the first date, and understandably so. Our bodies are hardwired to bond with sexual partners and one study has suggested women retain the DNA of their past lovers. Much of this uncertainty is preventable if you get to know someone before getting down. It’s not rocket science, friends, it’s hormones.

I’ll wrap my annual Valentine’s Day post with a note of positivity. 2016 is on track to be a better year than the last. I’ve lived fearlessly and for myself. I gained introspection while planting seeds of self-love. I’m in a place where I can love on my own terms, which gives me better radar to find the man of my dreams, wherever he may be.

(confidently swipes right)

♥ BB

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Instagram Ignores States’ Rights

Monday, October 12th, 2015

Western Cultured Canceled

Last Monday I logged into Instagram like any other, but what I found left my stomach in knots. Instagram deleted Western Cultured‘s account without any explanation. Moreover, the app glitched up making it impossible to file an appeal.

After serious tears and a coffee run, I pulled it together to file a complaint with the Better Business Bureau. I’m writing this blog because I’ve yet to hear from Instagram and believe they should respect states’ rights to #LetUsGrow.

Western Cultured is a branding company for a legally recognized i502 recreational cannabis producer in Washington State. Our page featured legally grown cannabis plants, adults 21+ and included a disclaimer. All content on our page is owned by Western Cultured (and produced by moi). We did not use our page to sell cannabis, promote underage smoking or irresponsible cannabis use.

Instagram has picked favorites and chosen to delete some pages, while keeping others. (Side note: we love all cannabis pages and don’t want any others removed!) The Washington State Liquor and Cannabis Board even recommended we create the Western Cultured brand to avoid conflicts like this.

Alas, Instagram ignores states rights, and they’ve written it into their terms. “Buying or selling illegal drugs (even if it’s legal in your region), as well as promoting recreational drug use, is not allowed.”

Facebook-owned Instagram is a progressive, open-minded company, which is why I’m baffled at their decision to censor pages that promote cannabis. Twenty-three states and the District of Columbia have laws legalizing marijuana in some form. Four states plus DC have legalized it for recreational use. Recreational cannabis is a multi-billion dollar industry and Washington State alone generated over $100 million in tax revenue since i502’s inception.

The time and effort of the last six months, to not only gain followers but build relationships, has been stolen from me. Poof. Vanished into cyberspace. Instagram isn’t just about photos and likes, it’s about sharing moments and building brands. With time, recreational cannabis brands will parallel those like Budweiser, Coca-Cola or Marlboro. We are on the ground floor of a budding industry, which is why platforms like Instagram are so vital to establishing our brand.

It’s uncertain why our page was targeted. We didn’t have nearly the followers of other accounts (although a 1:13 ratio is dang good!) and an organic High Times repost resulted in major page growth. Coincidentally, the night before our page deletion, I privately IG messaged a friend about my job and suggested he check out our page. Is Instagram using algorithms to monitor chats? I don’t know. Some speculate industry competition reported our page, which I hope isn’t true (hello, bad karma). If it is, we’re doing something right, and we’ll be back with a vengeance.

For now, it feels like a bad breakup. Every day I check our page, hopeful it’s been reactivated. My heart needs time to heal (AKA I’m waiting on that BBB complaint) and with time I might create a new account, but nothing will compare to @westerncultured. I’m always one to light up the moment, but for now, the flame of my creativity has been put out.

I’m looking at you Mark Zuckerberg.

p.s. If anyone has a contact at Facebook or Instagram, please message me ASAP.

♥ BB

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Six Months in Seattle

Thursday, October 1st, 2015

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Today marks six months since I moved to Seattle.

I can’t believe it’s been half a year since I left LA. Wasn’t I just packing my apartment, like, yesterday? Time has flown by, and it’s no surprise when I reflect on the last 180-something days.

Our garden has grown from five employees to 25. I’ve hiked foggy Cascades and ridden the glassy Columbia. My dad visited the warehouse. My mom visited the warehouse. I trolled socialists at a Bernie Sanders rally. We spent a weekend at La Push and smoked out Slightly Stoopid. I solo hiked Lake Blanca, watched a lunar eclipse from Mt. Pilchuck and even with a six year break, can still throw down behind a boat. Did I mention I’m selling tons (or pounds) of cannabis? Yeah, that too.

I’ve felt solitude, success, indecision and excitement. Seattle isn’t what I expected, even as a northwest native, yet I’m not upset about it. Business is booming, the industry is changing and I’m writing one helluva chapter in my life story.

From Seattle to SoCal, thank you to friends and family who’ve been so supportive. Stay tuned…

♥ BB

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I’m Coming Home

Thursday, April 9th, 2015

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Four years ago, almost to the date, I set off on an excellent adventure. Los Angeles offered a part-time job and full-time opportunity. I took it, unsure where life would lead.

In that time I lived in Venice Beach, volunteered on Skid Row, conducted market research for Fortune 500 companies, started a political nonprofit, partied with *famous* people, experimented with fashion, met friends who became practically siblings, made priceless memories and emotionally grew more than I could ever fathom.

Los Angeles will always hold a place in my heart. So what brought me back?

I received an unexpected job offer and my gut told me to go for it, so I did. I’m working for a Tier 2 Recreational Marijuana Producer and Processor. I’ll be doing sales and social media, but until the operation is fully running, it’s all hands on deck. That’s right, I’m growing pot for a living. Did I mention the company is owned by one of my best girlfriends?

I love politics, and recreational pot is very political. Last year Washington State earned over $40 million in revenue from legalization. Revenue from weed goes towards schools, and that doesn’t include the millions taxpayers save by redirecting police resources to crimes that matter.

What about A Generation Empowered? Don’t worry, Fiscal Friday will resume next week (sorry, still getting settled) and I’ve already joined Seattle Libertarian MeetUps. Bottom line: my political POV isn’t going anywhere.

While I miss sunny SoCal, Seattle feels right. I’ve gone for several runs along Green Lake, and experience the same energy I did living in Venice. Well, minus the transients smoking crack in my driveway… Anyway, Seattle rocks. Clean air, tolerable traffic, no street sweeping and NO PARKING ENFORCEMENT. If I can handle Los Angeles (and China), I can handle anything.

I didn’t leave Los Angeles, I decided to expand my network. Thank you to all my Angelenos for the unforgettable adventures. My lakeside doors are always open. To my Seattleites, thanks for the birthday bash. I have a ton of leftover booze. Let’s kick it.

Pacific Northwest, I’m back and I’m coming for you.

♥ BB

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Accepting Alone

Friday, February 13th, 2015

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In my teens I hoped to find my high school sweetheart. In my 20’s I thought I’d find Mr. Right. The closer I get to 30, the more comfortable I am alone. The following Valentine’s Day post isn’t meant to dig at married friends, rather explain why I’m more focused on myself than a man.

Reflecting on the emotional development from my early to late-20’s, I wasn’t ready for a serious relationship. I needed to travel the world, have fun and build my career. I didn’t know what I wanted. In hindsight, if I’d settled down, I doubt it would’ve worked. If I’m uncertain in myself, I can’t be confident in a relationship. Moreover, my relationship priorities have changed. It’s not about social status and Instagram image, it’s about finding someone who makes you laugh, makes you think and challenges you to be a better person. I haven’t found that person, and that’s ok.

I refuse to accept societal pressure and wife up because of a biological clock. And no, being single at 27 doesn’t default me to a lesbian (what a rude assumption). The last thing our planet needs is women who procreate because their uterus is ticking. I’m yet to meet a man I can’t live without, and who can’t live without me. Why is this so hard to comprehend?

I’m painfully aware I’m a product of my environment. My parents provided a less-than-stellar relationship model and like most millennials, I came from a broken home. As an adult, it’s made me intolerant of mistreatment. Sure relationships require compromise, but some things aren’t worth sacrificing. Patience, kindness and trust are essential.

Ironically, last year I didn’t write a Valentine’s Day blog despite my first relationship in eight years. Why? Subconsciously I knew we weren’t compatible (and post-breakup his accidental admittance of infidelity confirmed these feelings). Looking back, I wanted love so badly, I overlooked relationship deal breakers. I ignored my own advice and started to settle.

I wrote about this in 2010 and still see it today. Admittedly unhappy couples sticking it out because they fear life alone. The transition from relationship to independence might evoke feelings of isolation, but with one life to live, why settle for sub-par love?

As if finding a significant other isn’t hard enough, it’s especially difficult to date in the digital age. Communication has morphed into a series of right swipes and misinterpreted texts. Long gone are the days where a man point blank asks you out. Bottom line: dating fucking sucks.

Of course bachelorette life can seem desolate. Who doesn’t want a special someone to share in their everyday adventures? Instead of dwelling on it, I’d rather work, workout and work on my tan. What’s meant to be, will be, because love happens when you least expect it.

I’ve been the best friend, the friend with benefits, the rebound and, unbeknownst to me, the other woman. I’ve been turned down, dumped, cheated on, and heartbroken. The only thing I haven’t been is “the one.” While it’s a bummer cruising solo, it won’t last forever and when Mr. Right rolls around, I will love him with all I’ve got.

♥ BB

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